Alot can happen within a year. Alot. That you never think about. You begin it without ever expecting much except of course what you are expecting. You expect to do the things that you want to do then get on with it. You never bargain for the small things that will turn monumental. You never bargain to finally find true love. You don’t bargain to meet soulmates, sisters and people who influence you towards a positive change. People who genuinely care about people just because they can. You don’t owe them anything and they don’t want anything from you except maybe for respect and honesty both for self and them. Well-wishers, do-gooders, laugh-with-you-at-yourself kind of people. Nah…you never bargain for that.
Life teaches us many things. All of us. From the day we are born right till we die. We never stop learning. Yet we are always in shock and in awe whenever we learn something new about ourselves. We are in shock when we find we are much stronger that we actually thought, smarter than we actually gave ourselves credit. Yet in some way or other, maybe deep in our sub-conscious we knew these things. Just maybe too afraid to explore. Or maybe. Or maybe. Too many maybies.
Point is…I’m sitting here realising some of my mistakes. At times when the only thing you’ve ever known is to be a soldier it’s kinda hard to be learning anything else in your adulthood. I’m learning that just because my best friend betrayed me in the worst way possible it does not mean other people will do the same. Just because you’ve ever been hurt. Learnt the hardest lessons. Been the bravest. Saved the world. Does not make you any less or any better of a person. We all have our struggles, heart aches and issues. We carry them with us, we deal with them, we move on to a healthier, happier life.
And just because all you’ve ever known is a fist, doesn’t mean that the hand doesn’t eventually open up to a soft palm. Life is not a journey. It’s an experience. It’s beauty is mostly in the eye of the beholder. Maybe we just need to be more accepting of ourselves, the people and the world around us. It may not be easy but the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
So here’s to taking that first step…