A googled goodbye

I guess it depends on whom you’re saying it to or why you are saying it. It kinda bugs me because I don’t really like it. Come to think of it nobody really likes it. Depending of course on the situation. What am I on about? Goodbyes. I hate them with a passion. I’ve been coming to my blog every now and then and I completely stop myself everytime. I have to say goodbye. So I looked up all the intelligent ways to say goodbye on Google and there’s all sorts of them-from saying goodbye to cellulite, cancer and of course your boss from HELL 😀 I’d look forward to that. Infact I’ve done it twice-said goobye to bosses. Both of them not emotional occasions. Ha!

I guess the year has come to an abrupt end. I remember what I was thinking this time last year. Bright future. Now my world is filled with so much uncertainty. Drama. The end of the year results are going to be up by Thursday and I will know my fate. My stomach churns. I’ve passed most of those that they’ve hung up. Except for one-Political Sciences. Sucks. I hate politics. Well , not really. I’m now praying that I make it. I’m praying that I make it but I’m not praying for my sake but for that of my childs. All I do is for him. I can hear you silently thinking-why now must you expect distinctions when you spent the entire year not working towards them. Well…the simple answer is I know I’m no genius rather a hard worker. I worked hard. I worked my bum off. I worked so hard that bullets became my sweat. I pulled assignments out of my arse..and it is rather large what with being an African child.

The fun is over now. No moments of laughter. Bittersweet sorrow. Uncertainty. Life hanging in the balance. No more poetry. Death sentence. God I hope life works out. For me and for you. I wish I was born rich then I wouldn’t have to struggle. I wish I didn’t have a child so I wouldn’t worry so much. But then wishing for all these things means me wishing to not be me. I love my son. I love my life. Whether or not I pass life still works out. Maybe not the way I wanted it to but maybe just as God intended.

Back to goodbye. It’s the end of the year. End of school. Beginning of holidays. Stuffing my face. Days (which will feel like centuries) of not smoking. Gaining weight. Days of laughter. Drinking. Hanging out with friends. Life. The Beauty.

Enjoy it folks. With me in spirit. Gosh, I sound like I’m going to die. haha. I’m not dying. I’ll live forever. I wish. Whenever I can, I’ll pop in. Whenever you can, pray. Pray that I pass so we may spend more days together. Lord knows I’ve enjoyed my days as a blogger. Ah , well, as my grandmother always says-all good things must come to an end. The pessimist.

I can’t say it can I? Don’t blame me. I love you too much to say goodbye…so I won’t say it. Rather, I’ll say, till we meet again. To a brighter future. Enjoy the festivities.

All my love,

Me

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