Another fight with the matriarch. Gosh. Really? At this day and age? Well, I suppose it was bound to happen sometime. Nothing new, basically all the old news about the nothingness I am. I translate it to the novelty of my homecoming wearing off and me needing to be out there once more. It’s been a while really, a long one even for me I must admit. So here I am, getting my a$s back on the horse.
I’m cool about most things. Had almost started not believing in myself, thank goodness for sanity. I still write, sing, craft, love and live. Well put, LoyZaR is still intact baby and I’ll be damned to let her fall apart all willy-nilly like that. Nah dude, homie don’t play that.
I’m thankful for most things that are happening. That I am at the ‘lowest’ point in my life which basically means from here I can only go up. Yay! I am loving that. My son and I are spending more time together which is spoiling the both of us. ‘Daddy’ still actin a fool still – I have surrendered to the possibilities of him never maturing. Hey…what can I do? It’s how it is sometimes you know. Can’t spend all my time tryna make him grow up. Nah uh… that’s not how LoyZaR do.
I’m cool man, alive and well. Missing my man. Hoping he keeps true to his word and comes through this weekend to spend time and see his family nahmean? Also it will give us some perspective. I’m hot on his heels though. Yep, I am back to being on the move again, so I think it’s safe to say Jozi can expect to see my black, beautiful behind one of these days. Yeah man, been too spoilt and that. Too comfortable that I forgot about alot of things.
Time for LoyZaR to hit the streets if you know what I mean. So if you out there, reading this and about to spark one…spare a thought for this lady. Put some positive energy coz I sure as hell am. We gotta make these dreams a reality man, how it is.
Poetry still reigns. When all else fails, love. Immensely.